After spending considerable time writing a really heart-felt post earlier today, I clicked "enter" and... "blink"...the computer decided to shut my program down. Quick as that. Everything gone.
The picture here describes pretty well the various devices of destruction I wished to have in that moment. Not being real tech savy, I desparately called for my wife to come in and try to find it somewhere, anywhere. As she walked in to my office, calm as usual, she took the mouse in hand and said, "That's why you always click 'save.'"
Now, a season or two ago, my High D (or A, depending on the personality test) temperament would have triggered something you would not have heard about on Sundays. Combine that with French blood flowing through my veins, and you had atomic capabilities/possibilities.
Sadly, for many years after becoming a Christian, I was still a very angry person. It didn't take much to set me off. I was impatient with my kids, my wife, and everyone else by and large.
Looking back, I see that my anger had its roots all the way back to my childhood (sounds like a movie already, doesn't it?). I grew up in an alcoholic home, never feeling in control. It continued after salvation in knowing that I should be like Jesus, but failing miserably again and again. Then I had expectectations of others. They should act the way I wanted them to. Whether my kids, my wife, whoever. But worst of all, I had these expectations of myself. I just couldn't control me.
And I was an angry person.
Well, thankfully, somewhere along the way, the Holy Spirit gained ground in this area of my life. I don't really think we can "manage" our anger. I think we surrender control. Again. And again. And again. And again. A thousand little surrenders over plenty of years. One day we look back and realize, "Wow, I am no longer controlled by anger. Holy Spirit, you really are changing me." We surrender our anger to Him and little by little He replaces it with the character of Christ: self-control, patience, peace and all the rest of the fruit of the Spirit we so deeply want.
I'm glad I'm not that angry person anymore. Oh, and by the way, my computer is fine....
Grace to you, PB
Bob, Microsoft products also have an "auto save" feature that needs to be set up on your PC. If you set it to autosave every minute, you will lose little of your work!
Blessings!
Posted by: Bill R | October 01, 2005 at 01:49 PM
Great quote! "I don't really think we can "manage" our anger. I think we surrender control." Sometimes I think we work so hard to get things right so that we can be presentable to God, and God is saying just come to me. Rest in me. Find your hope in me. Overcome your problems in me. Surrender to me.
Great word!
Posted by: Rob-coast | September 28, 2005 at 10:41 PM